By January I was finding it challenging not having someone to speak with about all the thoughts and concerns in my head. Yes, I could speak with Brooke, but I was worried about hurting her feelings. I needed a sister and friend to share my feelings with.
Brooke and I decided to tell my sister Angela and her husband Timmy first. They were both family and best friends to us. Past comments and experiences from them, made me feel more comfortable that they would support us. Even with this confidence I was still terrified. My family means a lot to me and even though I was so sure they would be fine, there was a small part of me that was terrified they wouldn’t be. This played out every time we told friends and family. If you have watched Ted Lasso, there is a great part where the character Colin comes out, that speaks to this so well. I also work with Timmy so that added an extra layer of complexity. We knew we were a long way away from wanting to let our workplaces know.
We decided to have them over for dinner and drinks on a Friday in mid-January 2023. We waited until later in the evening so that if they felt they needed to leave to process the information they could without it seeming rude.
It was hard to get started talking but finally I looked at Brooke and we decided it was time. Sitting at our kitchen table, Brooke and I next to each other, with Ang on Brooke’s right and Timmy on my left I started to talk. I think I said something along the lines of “We have something we need to tell you both. A couple months ago “Brooke” let me know they are experiencing Gender Dysphoria. This is when you don’t feel your assigned gender matches who you really are. She has been seeing a therapist to talk through her feelings and she has decided to begin affirming her gender as a female. I understand this will come as a shock. Going forward we will be using she/her pronouns and her new name Brooke when around people who know. She is the same person she has always been but will start presenting as herself more often. “
I think I cried a bit. It was still hard to say the words back then. They were both so supportive and loving. Ang asked many kind and loving questions. Timmy was a little goofy with some of his questions, which was perfect because it helped break the tension and reminded everyone, we were the same four people we always were.
From there we had similar conversations with Brooke’s siblings and my other two sisters but they all lived further away so it was done by phone, text or FaceTime. Then we told our very good friends Luke and Sandra. Each time we were terrified and each time we were met with love and understanding.
One response to “Starting to Tell More People”
This is amazing! In my own experience, I found that the people I figured the most telling were the ones over the most accepting and understanding. One statement though it was said that I have to have a different opinion on , the statement that is the same person. Right now. It probably seems like it is, but as a mature into the woman they are. You’re going to find out that it’s a whole new person with different likes, feelings and emotions.