Gender Affirming Surgery

I’m going to skip ahead in time to the now as this is an important part of my life. It’s also what has dominated my thoughts since the date for my surgery was selected.  In a future post I may go into some of the details about how this all came to be. For now, as the day is coming close (tomorrow as I write this) I feel I need to talk about the week leading up to the date.

Last Week at Work

Thankfully, the last week was a short one as Monday was a holiday here in Canada. That also had its downside too as there was a lot of things to wrap before I go off on leave for potentially 8-12 weeks. As my job includes a lot of coaching of individuals to complete certification projects as part of their training, I needed to make sure there was a good path for each of the students to completion. In some cases, I was able to hand over some of the responsibilities to others in their business, and in others, Cathy was able to take over for me. Yes, not only do we work in the same company, but we also share certain skill sets that allow us to support each other too. This setup required meetings with the 10-12 people I was coaching at the time.  This is one of the best parts of my job though, so it was a great way to fill up the week.

One of the best parts of the week was when people would pop their head into the office, or send me a note, just to see how I’m doing.  I work with a lot of great people and it was so meaningful to have them come by just to let me know that they were thinking of me.  The team I manage is the best of all as they treated me so well this past week.  I think I have left things in a good place.

The Last Days Before Surgery

In Canada, the Medicare programs from each province contribute to the care of Transgender people; some more than others.  In my province, the health system does pay for gender affirming bottom surgery for trans woman – mind you, that is all they pay for.  To take advantage of this care, you have to go to Montreal to get the surgery completed.  So yesterday (Saturday), Cathy and I hopped on a plane and started the trip. Of course, it wouldn’t be a flight with Air Canada unless it is delayed. For us, it was delayed 2.5 hours, but we got into Montreal and then our hotel by 10pm, so not awful.

Today (Sunday) we decided to take it a bit easier and just pass the time here in Montreal. We did a little shopping for ourselves and just tried to enjoy the day. There was an unexpected hiccup in the plans for a quiet day though…

The COVID Test

A requirement for surgery in Quebec that require anesthetics, is that all patients complete a COVID test using the PCR method no more than 3 days prior to the surgery.  This meant that on the Friday before, I had to go to my family doctor’s office to get this done. This wasn’t easy to figure out though. As COVID is really not thought about much anymore, there is very little information on how to get this done. It required a few phone calls to government offices and the hospitals to figure out that my family doctor should be able to complete it. The office couldn’t confirm this for me though, so I booked a COVID test in Montreal on the Sunday as a backup plan if I couldn’t find anything at home.  A couple days after I first asked, my doctor’s office called and said that they could do it after all, and I booked the appointment. 

When I went into the office on Friday, I sat down in one of the patient rooms when the doctor came in and told me that they had to check to see if the testing equipment that she had available could be used for COVID tests as all of tests designed specifically for COVID must have expired.  The doctor left the room and came back with news that we were good to go. She could not confirm when I would get the results back though, so it was a good thing that I still had the backup in Montreal.

On Saturday morning, I checked the results page and to my surprise, there was a negative test result for me there that I could send to the Montreal hospital.  A couple of interesting things on the result were that my gender marker was wrong and there was a little note on the bottom of the result saying there was some complication with the identification of the sample and the records. I assumed, and was later confirmed, that this all had to do with the provincial program that logs and keeps the records, still hadn’t updated to my new name and gender yet. …sigh… I did find out the doctor that did my COVID test had to go to the analysis lab the night before to sign off on the testing result.  That was amazing dedication, and I thanked her multiple times for helping to make sure that I got my results.

The Close Call

With the results sent off to my surgeon’s office, I confidently cancelled my back up test here in Montreal.  Things seemed to going great today (Sunday) until I opened my mouth and mentioned that it was nice to not have to run to a different clinic today to get the COVID test.  Within minutes, I received an email from the Montreal office saying that there was a problem with the COVID test from Friday that I submitted. According to email from the hospital, they said that it was the wrong type and would not be accepted.  But this is the day before the surgery – there was little time. I have heard and read that they turn patients away without the negative result in their hands. I started to panic. I was actually shaking while Cathy and I were having lunch, and the email came in. Tears started forming as all I could think about was going through all this trouble, getting to Montreal, preparing everything at home and at work, and of course, not being able to get the surgery that I had been waiting for.  

Thankfully, Cathy was there to calm me down. She reassured me that they would be able to get me tested as the email did say that I’d be able to get a test first thing in the morning. But that was not good enough for my mind. It knew that there was a good chance that things might fall through, whether that was true or not.  I emailed the hospital back, with a few corrections and questions about the result hoping that there had been a mistake.  It wasn’t until we arrived back at the hotel that I received a reply.  There had been a misinterpretation of the results and that yes, my original test results would be acceptable and no further actions were required.  That was when the emotions came out of me. I cried hard and then laughed at the whole situation, all the while Cathy hugged me close. In my mind at the time, it was a disaster nearly avoided. I’m sure things would have turned out all right but not knowing would have made it very difficult to sleep.

One thing is for sure, if there were any doubts in my mind that I wanted this surgery, they disappeared the second that first email came in. I know with 100% certainty that this is something that I need not something that I want.

Well, off to prepare myself for the big day tomorrow.  There are a lot of little things that they ask the patient to do to prepare. I need to try to get some sleep too as it is a big day tomorrow.