As I mentioned in the post leading up to my top surgery, I was surprised at how meaningful this procedure would be to me. There was a different purpose to have this surgery. My bottom surgery was about changing a part of me that didn’t belong. Something that I didn’t like seeing and was just in the way. This top surgery is more about looking closer to, and feeling more like, the person I know I am. It will add confidence and allow me to look at myself in the mirror and see a body that aligns with who I am.
This procedure did not take as much planning thankfully. And the recovery is significantly less demanding than my surgery in May. I only ended up booking a week’s vacation for work as I’ve heard that I should be able to get back to my desk job in about that time. Truthfully, when it was all said and done, I could have been back to my desk job a few days after the surgery.
The one catch was that I was originally told that I would be able to return to the hotel the night of the surgery. I was not told that I would be required to have someone there with me when I was leaving, however. I booked my flight to Montreal during the seat sale and got great tickets but booking Cathy’s flight one month before travel, was more expensive. But what else was I going to do. So, Cathy booked her flight too and after making arrangements to have a niece stay at our home with our son Colin, we were on our way back to Montreal.
Leading up to Surgery
The process and information given leading up to the breast augmentation was not as tight as my bottom surgery. This didn’t concern me though as the surgery is not nearly as complex. I did have to go get my post-op medication on my own as they do not fill prescriptions at the private hospital for day surgeries. Once we checked-in to the room near the Montreal airport, Cathy and I went on a short walk to a local pharmacy where the hospital had set up the prescription. Luckily, the same hospital used a pharmacy of the same chain when I was there in May so they already had me in their system. On our way back to the hotel, we stopped and had a bite to eat. Just as with the bottom surgery, I wasn’t allowed to eat anything after midnight up to the surgery so I tried to find something filling. When we got back to the room, Cathy and I did a quick video for her TikTok account and settled in to bed.
The prep work for this surgery was not as complicated either. For the top surgery on the morning of, I only had to use a special anti-bacterial soap to clean the area, remove all piercings, and remember not to put on makeup. Those were easy and all taken care of while Cathy ran down to grab some breakfast. We took an Uber and made it to the hospital at 6:50am for check-in. Being there again brought back some great feelings. It’s amazing how the brain works and easily remembers the good times when you are having a positive life changing event. Just being back at the hospital made me excited and it allowed me to take it all in. I was so much more comfortable this second time. The waiting area and the admitting room didn’t seem nearly as daunting, though the wait to be admitted, took about an hour longer this time than in May. Funny thing, I was given the exact same room and bed that I was assigned when I was there in May. Unfortunately, it was taken when I showed up as the lady who was waiting to be moved over to Asclepiade, the convalescence ward in the hospital, was still in the room. By about 9:30am though, I was asked to change into the surgical gown and get ready to be taken up for surgery. So I went to the closest bathroom and changed in there.
Pre-Operation
On the way up to the operating room waiting area, I had some light conversation with one of the nurses. She let me know that being a nurse at a hospital like this was such an uplifting job. All of the patients there were happy to have their surgeries; the outcomes almost always made the patients happier than they were before. Just as we were heading into the elevator, I came across another nurse, Anastasia, that I recognized from my surgery in May. She was the one that helped guide me as I walked for the first time after bottom surgery. She said she remembered me from back in May and even came by my room later to say “hi” after my latest surgery.
I was brought up to a small waiting room where the surgeon comes to meet you and allows you to ask any last minute questions. If you read the blog on my bottom surgery, I would have mentioned this room before. It almost feels like a room where all you can do is wait and think about what is about to happen. There’s nothing in there but a chair and there is barely enough room for two people. I almost wonder if it designed to make you consider any second thoughts; no worries there. When I was there in May, I think I was there for about 40 minutes, and I never moved. This time, I got up, and explored a little. The window from the hallway outside the room overlooked the little garden and shelter area outside at the Asclepiade and more happy moments came rushing back to me.
About 10 minutes after getting there, Dr. Belanger came in to discuss the surgery. The first question she asked was if I still wanted double-Ds. That answered my biggest concern leading up to the surgery even before I could ask – did I choose too large of a size? I never wanted breasts that would stand out or get attention. I just wanted to fit in and be more comfortable with myself. My original plan was to get 650cc implants based on the consultation. When I got home, I used the “rice test” to check how the shape and size fit with my figure and clothes. At home, I started getting concerned with the plan and that I may have gone too large. So, I spoke to Dr. Belanger, and I mentioned that I would like to get something that is more average; something more proportional to my torso and body. She mentioned she would try a few options during the surgery, and I had complete faith that she would choose the right size. When everything was completed, I found out that she ultimately went with 500cc implants which I’m very happy with. She continued on, drawing on my chest where things were going to go. It was very light conversation and easy going. We even joked about her drawing a smiley face on me. A couple of minutes later, we were off to the operating room.
The Operation
I don’t think the operating room was the same as the one I was in back in May, but it definitely had the same feel. You need to repeat your name and what the surgery will be, a couple of times to confirm that you are the right patient. Eventually, I found myself lying down on the operating table. The anesthesiologist was on my left attaching my IV and another nurse was on my right attaching monitors and making sure I was comfortable. Though I was not nervous, I remember them having to tell me to relax my arm a bit more as it was clenched. I then had to breath deeply into a mask. Falling asleep took longer than I expected. I must have taken about 20 deep breaths before I actually went under.
The next thing I remember was being woken up in the recovery area. I heard my name, as I was being nudged a little. I was groggy but aware enough to recognize the recovery ward and the clock on the wall. I don’t remember having any pain right away but I do remember feeling like there was a lot of weight on my chest. Once my vitals were taken and it was confirmed that my room was cleared, I was wheeled back to my hospital room where Cathy was waiting. It was a struggle changing from the gurney to the bed. This was the first feeling of pain since the surgery. I knew then that it was going to be a challenge to shift around and reposition myself for the next little while. It felt like all of my chest muscles had gone through an extreme workout and I pulled something in everyone.
The process after the surgery once returning to the room was a little strange. It feels like the staff knows they need to keep you around for a while afterwards but there are no real goals or boxes to tick to make sure you are ready to leave. So, we just waited. Eventually I asked if I could get something to eat and after a couple of hours we asked if we could leave. They did discuss the dosages for my medications and some of the precautions I would need to take while I healed. Lastly, they fitted me for a surgical bra that I would need to wear for the next month. Once I was dressed, which was another challenge, we got ourselves another Uber and headed back to our hotel room.
The next days were a struggle but not intolerable. I was able to do a TikTok with Cathy the next morning… so I couldn’t have been too bad.
2 responses to “Second Gender Affirming Surgery (BA)”
Thank you again Brooke for sharing. Your story has been my biggest inspiration In what seems to be my very slow moving transition. Was the surgery covered ?
Thanks again! I wish I could tell you it was covered, but as of now, it has not been. I did receive approval from the province to have it paid for but it was given after the surgery date so I’m still working to see if I can get the funding. I’ll go into more detail in my next post which is an update on my recoveries.